"But I want it now!" (Said as Veruca Salt)

There are so many things I want. I try not to be selfish. I don’t complain too often. (I don’t think I do, but maybe you should ask my husband.) I don’t ask for jewelry, I don’t ask for fancy cars or houses. I don’t need Pottery Barn or Williams Sonoma filling my home, although I would love the life they promise in the catalogues. I do understand all those things are wants. I am willing to not have them for the ones I really, really do want. I want to have my children’s book published. Each day that goes by that I have not received a rejection letter or my packaged returned to me is good. I want to get some licensing deals from The Surtex Show and the Licensing show in May and June. (Wish me good vibes this May 16th – 18th!) I want to keep painting and selling my art for a long, long time. I am addicted to the smiles that come with each delivery. I admit it. It is perfectly selfish. I love showing kids and adults alike my art and telling them that yes, I paint silly dog and cat pictures for a living. I can’t wait for the day that I am not doing 8 hours a day of graphic design work and 5 hours a night of painting. Just one career please. Thank you. Are you listening to me universe? This two careers at once thing is tiresome. I just want to paint. I am almost there. I can feel it, taste it. I have worked hard towards my goals. I work long hours almost every night for almost 2 years now. So much so that if I only work a measly eight hours in a day I feel as if I have had the day off. That deserves a payoff right? Sure it does. So here I am. Putting it out there for the universe and God to hear. I am ready for my hard work to payoff and ready to ony have to work at my painting and illustration career. I will keep up my daily routine until you grant me my wish. I can tell you this: I am not giving up. I can keep this up another year if I have to. I don’t want to, but I will. I have always said that you cannot fail if you don’t give up. I may be tired, annoyed, and just about as over adobe Illustrator, photoshop and quark as one can be, but I won’t give up. And one day, I know, KNOW that I will be able to more than pay my bills from silly dog paintings alone. I will. I am a middle child. We are known for our stubborness. I am not giving up. Ever. So you might as well give me what I want. Ok, rant is over. I have to go do revise a magazine layout and brochure. But tonite, tonite I get to paint some dogs. And that makes me smile.

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