In heaven…

So you know what I did today – am doing today- internet? I am in my studio y’all! Painting! And oh my gosh, can I tell you how much I missed this? So much that I am taking a quick break to share it with you! Because I have missed painting so, so much. And I have been so sad and down and depressed lately. Because while I am so very grateful for my job and the stability and insurance it provides, really I am, I miss my days of working from home. This time of year in the past I had so many paintings to do. Christmas orders. And they were all lined up and they were all over the place. And it was joy and happiness and oh, my heart just so full. And this year I only have a few to do. That is because I have not been trying to get them them. Like I said, I’ve been sad and depressed-like.  And it seemed like no matter what I told myself at work, that this night I would go home and paint, or make an html email advertising my art to sell, that by the time I got home, maybe went for a run, made dinner, helped with homework…well by the time it got to ME time, CREATIVE time.. Well, I was DONE y’all. And after a year of that, a year of not making time for me I got sad. Then sadder. Then screw it, I am gonna give up, what else can I go to school for I am MISERABLE Y’ALL! I had no idea that the not painting was making me more and more sad. Even as much as it seems like smack me in the head obvious when I write it out here. *SMACK!*

But today I decided to paint. And I should be working from home, but I will work on WORK stuff tonite instead. Because I needed a day like this. A day where I have the music on and the coffee brewing and the paint is being painted ON THE CANVAS. Not in my head, not ideas for tomorrow, not sketches to create is ‘someday.’ Today. And it feels so, so good. My heart is so happy. And I KNOW this is what I am supposed to be doing. And I will make time again and I will make it my goal to quit my job. SOON. So I can do what I am supposed to be doing AND make money at it.

That is all internet. As you were. I will write more soon, but there are doggies that need to get painted so that they can get outta my head and on canvas so you can see them too. And do you wanna see what joy, happiness, my personal heaven looks like? Yeah? Good, cause I wanna show you:

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